photo from http://today.msnbc.msn.com/id/3041445/ns/today-parenting_and_family
Hello All - just a quick stop in -
Last night I had a wonderful evening with the All Genre All Gender Book club - photos later....
This morning I met with Gary Carden and then he introduced me to City Lights Bookstore owner, Joyce Moore, whom I spoke with for a time in her lovely bookstore.
Then while looking at something online, I see this article on how Mom's are revealing why they gave up their children - and there's all these articles linking to it; I haven't delved into it all yet -- but, this is one of the themes in Tender Graces; a mother giving up her children. This is still seen as something "bad" for a mother, right? (Father's get a pass, right?)--- anyone who is a mother knows the bond of a mother and child and even if there is a mother who does not feel that bond, she would not want to admit it, would she? This was on the Today show "Parenting and Family" website.
How timely that I had breakfast with Gary Carden, whose own mother gave him up so long ago, when he was a very young lad, and he's 74 now - he still wonders about his mother doing this. (We have this "mother giving us up" in common, though our circumstances aren't exactly the same).
I also find this timely to my book - but it must be a timeless issue. And it makes me wonder about these mom's "Coming out of the closet" so to speak and talking about how they "could possibly give up their children." The articles of what I've read so far make it sound like something new-when it is not. As a daughter who was given up by her own mother, and as an author who writes about this theme, I am interested in seeing what these "modern" mothers have to say. I was given up in the 60's . . . I suppose it wasn't talked about much then, our mother giving up my two brothers and me, to our father.
Anyway, just found it interesting I stumbled on that after meeting with Carden, and after writing the book, and after some other conversations this week.
From left, Marie Claire editor-in-chief Joanna Coles, clinical psychologist Judith Sills and noncustodial mom Rebekah Spicuglia discuss the growing trend of mothers relinguishing custody of their children with Meredith Vieira.
But, what are your thoughts on this? About mothers giving up custody of their children to the fathers . . . or have you done this? What do you think of mothers who do this? What did you think of how Katie Ivene gave up her three children (in Tender Graces - if you've read it)....is that what made her an unsympathetic character? or was she sympathetic? or what? Do Fathers "get a pass" on these things, when they leave their children behind and remarry and have more children - and do they 'get a pass' because mother's should have that Bond?
All my years I never much thought about my own mother's motivations and whether she was a "bad mother" or not for giving up her children (or did I? hmmm, okay how could I have not?)...now all this Media about it -- I'm curious where it will lead, and after I get some work done, later, I want to explore these articles.