Tuesday, February 3, 2009

Hey wait a minute Mr. Post man...Why I don't live at the P.O. A true Story

So. I get the addresses and prepare to send my little "thank you thoughts," along with "More than a mother's" BRIDA. And, thank you guys for entrusting me with your Realness - *smiling* ....anyway, I wanted to get everything in the mail soonest because I'm impatient like that, and because of snow and I may be housebound for a few days...or not...who knows.

I gather together some things, and some envelopes, and the addresses, throw them in my huge bag, and I head off the mountain into the valley to stop at Jelly Bellies (a cute little place to buy tourist stuff) and I pick up a few little tiny items, but they don't have all that I want-dang!...so, I leave with my few little purchases, and it's snowing. I sit in my car and start stuffing things in the envelopes fast as I can- oh geez! the envelopes are smaller than I thought (except for yours More than a mother!)....well, too late - I'm off the mountain, the envelopes are already addressed...

I go to the post office in the next town since my little town's PO closes from 1-2. While there, add extra tape to the bulging tiny envelopes with the stuff in them. I step to the counter and pile the envelopes there. The postman picks up the first one, More than a Mother's, and feels it. He looks at me. Then he puts the postage on it, going waaayyy off somewhere that's not the US. Then he picks up a little envelope, going waaay off somewhere that isn't the US, and then another going waayyy off outside the US, then he starts in on the US tiny envelopes. He feels each one and looks at me.

Finally, he said, "What is this bumpy thing?"

I answer, "A buckeye from my mountain."
"A buckeye? Are you from Ohio?"


"You know, Ohio Buckeyes...."
"Um, no...these are buckeyes from my buckeye tree on my mountain - my special buckeye tree! Here in WNC! "
Mr Postman says, "Wale, don't you'uns think these people (he holds up some envelopes) may have a buckeye tree around where they live and don't need your buckeyes from your mountain?"

I say, "Um, I don't know. Well, anyway I told people I was sending something from my mountain and...."

Feels feels. "Wait, what else is in here? This ain't just a buckeye in here!"

"Um, well, there's a rock in them, too...you know, from my creek or from a mountain walk...I think some people got a cherokee tear and then I ran out, dang, I need more cherokee tears - the others may have wanted a cherokee tear - shoot...Although this one and this one could prolly get their own...and..hmmmm..."
Tap Tap Tapping of tiny bulging envelope. "You'uns sending rocks, too?" Eagle-eying me.

Me, "Well...yes, and some of them might have something else, if I remembered to put things in the right places and all...and..well....some bookmarks of the mountains...."

"Don'choo think these persons who lives HERE and HERE may already know what a mountain looks like and don't need your bookmark with a mountain on it cause they know what a mountain looks like...? Especially THIS one..." (holds up an envelope).

"Um...well, yeah, but....see, these are ...the rocks and buckeyes are from MY cove...and the bookmarks were purchased from good ole Maggie Valley and I think it wasn't mountains, I think it was waterfalls or something..um ..you know? I mean...um..."

He pea-eyes me, says, "So, let me get this here straight - you are spending (this amount) to send buckeyes and rocks all over the world? huhn well...I'll be..."

"I think there may be a keychain or a magnet in a couple of them....um...if I remembered to put them in there..." Me fumbling in my gigantic Betty Boop purse to see if I lost any rocks, or buckeyes, or a keychain, or Cherokee tears that didn't make it into those tiny bulging envelopes....I fear someone may not get all I meant for them to get! oh! Oh! "Yeah, just little thoughts, you know?...um..."
"Uh huhn." he feels an envelope. "What's this? it feels flat and kinda soft."

"Um, it's a piece of bark."

"A piece of Bark....."

"Well, one of the people said they like nature and things from nature on the mountain, so I....put....a piece of....um....bark in there....with moss on it...."
"Wale, uh huh. I see..." (but his eyes says he doesn't see).

He busies himself putting them all in the bin to go out, feeling each one again before he throws them in the piles, takes my money, grins at me, and then says, "You have a good day now, Ma'am!"
I say, "You, too! See you later!"
I slide on out the door...not turning around to see if he's staring at me with that quirked up grin and twinkly eyes.
I walk out into a furious falling snow, get in my Subaru, and drive home with snow slamming my windshield - and I never felt happier. Pieces of my mountain going all over the world - even if they are tiny pieces, even if the person can get their own rocks or their own buckeyes, they don't have one from Killian Knob! Ha! And some of the buckeyes even have little indentions to rub your finger like a worry stone--that's what I do as I walk the mountain. And the rocks are ANCIENT rocks - yeah! from some of the oldest mountains in the world--The Smoky Mountains! ha! Yeah! I humm... la tee dah - I drive back to my little cove and go inside my warm little log house. All is well.
(google image of postman pat www.theplayshack.co.uk)


Lisa said...

whata grat story- i am so sorry i missed out on the chance to get a buckeye ( ? ) and a rock- I collect rocks/stones from all over the world- i love your writing, i am glad i found you xx

Debbie said...

I can't wait to see what shows up in my mailbox! What a great story. You're the best.

Angie Ledbetter said...

LOL! Lost my rocks long ago. :)

smiles4u said...

I think this is great! I love stuff like you sent to people...you should see my bowls and jars of rocks and other keepsakes that my grandchildren have given me!

Bella@That damn expat said...

I can't believe you didn't tell him to mind his own business.

jinksy said...

All those natural things are the best kind of keepsakes, better than any that can be boughtin shops. Well done for valuing them as they deserve to be valued.

Stephen said...

Dear Kathryn, No, he did not see. Great post!
As ever be well

~Jamie said...

haha I think it's a great idea! Sending out parts of your mountain is like giving people little pieces of you!

Jessica said...

What a party pooper. I think it would be cool to get something from your mountain. :-)

kimmi said...

How cool is that?! Lucky people rcvg. your special pkgs.

Kathryn Magendie said...

Hey yawwlll! Okay, I think all y'all should send me a rock from your places, and I'll send you a rock or buckeye from my place! I should post about this...laugh! (but of course, I'm thinking "rocks rocks rocks from across the land!")

Lisa said...

I am SO happy to send you a rock or two from beautiful NEWcastle, NSW, AUstralia- I also ask friends to bring me back rocks from all over the world when they travel- they thinki i am kidding, but i have a great collection. Dear Kathryn, send me your postal address !!!!

Katrina Stonoff said...

Oh, wow. I LOVE that you're sending rocks and buckeyes and bark from your mountain. I'm with Lisa -- sorry I missed the chance! I'd happily send you a rock from my mountain (well, hill), but it would be mossy.

Oh, and your author photo is lovely (I can't comment on MSN)! I still prefer the ones where you look interesting rather than beautiful, but you DO look beautiful.

t i m said...

I patiently await my buckeye. :)

Traveling through time and space said...

Kathryn - I totally relate to your wanderings through bloggyland.

Regarding the Uranus/George thing, while it is true that Herschel originally named the planet to honor King George III, it is a little known fact that later astronomers renamed the planet Uranus, because it was foretold in the stars that a subsequent George, a previous (thank God!) ruler of the US, (also known as W) would be a real a**hole.

Sorry, was that too rude? I could not resist.

There is mass hilarity in our household about Uranus. My children learned that it is a gas giant. Really, all you have to say around here is "Uranus" for a very cheap laugh.

Fantastic Forrest
Traveling Through Time and Space

Hippy Witch said...

I love your post. Your thought of sending people gifts like that makes them so much more special. I also live in Newcastle, Australia, I am a friend of Lisa's and a fellow rock collector, I also have rocks from all over the world, my friends think Im the easiest and cheapest person to get a gift for, because all I want is a rock. My husband wasn't happy when the cost of our luggage cost $100 extra because of rocks that I collected in Tasmania. I will get you a rock from Lake Macquarie and also 1 of my beautiful rocks from Tasmania, and send with Lisa's. Blessing to you

Sandra Leigh said...

"He pea-eyes me" - That's wonderful. So is your tag, "postmen with twinkly eyes". Great post, Kathryn.

amy said...

i love that you send people (all over the world!) parts of your mountain, kat. i once saw an hgtv show where a woman had sand and dirt in baggies from each of the countries she'd visited around the world. and whenever i go to a beach, i always come back with a bagful of seashells. i think there's spirit in pieces of the earth, and if i keep a part of wherever i've been then i'm keeping a part of that place's spirit. and spirit MATTERS.

and i've been to your part of WNC. some of my fondest moments have been in the smokey mountains--there isn't a season when it's NOT a good time to be there. that's part of your area of the world's spirit.

post office workers are soooo silly.


Barry said...

Wish I'd been in the post office to see that!

What a wonderful idea, sharing a bit of your reality with others.

We still have a collection of rocks my daughters used to collect when we went on vacation. Each one is still a talisman that brings back the feel of that time more vividly than our photos.

Janna Qualman said...

Oh, phooey! That man just didn't know greatness was in his presence. Any one of those things sounds wonderful, Kat.

JOY said...

Super brightened my day - received bark, buckeye and rock from your mountain! A piece of shared heaven! *smile*

Deb Shucka said...

What a lovely funny story. I love the idea of all those parts of you and your mountain being sent to new friends. I love that the postman saw absolutely nothing wrong with questioning you at length about the contents of your envelopes.

Anonymous said...

What a wonderful thing to do. I am even more excited at getting my parcel now that I can visualise you at the post office!

giddymomof6 said...

LOL! I LOVED THIS STORY! And as someone who has lived the last eight years overseas... I know exactly what you mean about postmen thinking you're crazed when you send stuff to people! LOL!