The Work-Out Writer: How Bad Do You Want This?

I climbed on the treadmill today with less energy than I wanted. Since at least Monday, I’ve had a dull headache and that weird “impending doom” feeling. GMR teases me about it, but I usually say “Something’s coming,” when I feel this way. That something’s usually geological or atmospheric or combo. I’ve been "right," but maybe as well there are times I’ve been wrong and just didn’t note it—all could be a coincidence. I’m still feeling it today, and danged if some weird thought didn't bomp me in my head: “under the sea,” and now I’m feeling foolish and where was I on this post? I sure need to talk about "distraction" don't I?

Oh yes . . . treadmill, no energy - the old "I don't know if I can do this today" come calling . . .

You think this snail worries about how long it'll take it to cross the road? Does it pause to consider how sucky it is?

During my jog, I wanted to stop multiple times. I didn’t want to challenge myself. I wanted Easy. To go along at this slow steady pace, or better yet, walk, or better yet, jump off and go do something else. I became so frustrated with myself, that I yelled in my head, like a red-faced coach, “HOW BAD DO YOU WANT THIS? HUH? HOW BAD DO YOU WANT THIS?” And all of a sudden, I wanted it BAD! I was fired up! I was ready to work. I bumped up the speed and tore off on the treadmill.

During one particular song, I pushed off on my leg and hovered in the air before slamming down, and did it again and again. As I hovered there, it felt as if I were suspended about a foot in the air, when in reality, I probably only came up a few inches—but the Perception was I felt myself higher. Does it really matter if I only came up a few inches? Or is the Perception of what I felt I accomplished a just-as-important reality? I like to think the latter, for it inspired me to take it further/farther, to run stronger, to push myself past the point of what I thought, or what I told myself (and this is an important insight), was my limit.

HOW BAD DO YOU WANT THIS?

Take what I said above and apply it to your writing life, or your musical life, or your artistic life, or your work life, your home life, your Life. How bad do we want what we think we want the most? How hard are we willing to work for it? How often are we willing to feel uncomfortable? How often are we able to face disappointment and still go on? And how much are we willing to push ourselves past the point where we think we must stop?

And when we push off, hovering in the air, feeling powerful and strong, do we let that wonderful perception spur us on to do more and better and stronger? Or do we say, “Eh, I was really only inches off the ground. No big deal. Other people can jump higher. Eh.” How bad do you want this? Bad enough to sweat and push and sprint and, as well, sometimes to feel pain and set-backs and exhaustion but pick yourself up and do it again. And again. And again. And again. Once again.

I’ll tell you what giving up or giving in gives you: Not a danged thing but regret. And the flipside of that is this: you can work your ass off and still not reach all of your goals, but I can guarantee you’ll have accomplished more than you ever dreamed you could if you do not give in to negativity and fear and doubt, and note I said "not give in to it" not that you'll never feel those things.

You’ll have jumped up, hovered higher than you ever thought you could soar, grow stronger, faster, more determined. Note the accomplishments and savor them, for even the smallest goal reached is A Goal Reached. Why do we disregard even the smallest of goals? They weren’t so small when we were arching towards them, were they?

How bad do you want this?

Photos by kat . . .

Join me at No Reason Whatsoever: Catherine's A Loooseeanner girl gone Caleefornia girl



My sweet Norah Kathryn Lil Boop is inspiration for me to be a better me in all I do

 

























Hi Y'all - I'm still over at Catherine's Place "No Reason Whatsoever" talking about inspiration.

Says Catherine: In Louisiana (where I'm from), we tend to speak a little differently. Instead of saying we're doing something because 'I want to', you're more likely to hear 'oh, no reason', 'just because' or my favorite 'no reason whatsoever'. Or sometimes it's 'no earthly reason whatsoever'. In that case, I suppose there must be a heavenly reason... :) :) I love La.!!!





So, come join in over there and say hello to Catherine. Leave your own inspiration if you wish (and I've read every one of them in the post below - made me smile and feel happy!)

I'll be back on Wednesday . . .

Angels of Venice, Lionheart, and Virginia Kate . . . music without words . . .

Good Morning!

I was thinking about "muses" and what inspires creativity. Though I do believe that if you wait for inspiration to come, you may spend a lot of time waiting and little time doing. For me, I see the actual doing as creating the inspiration. So, when I sit down to write, and put my fingers to the keys, and begin writing, then inspiration comes. I don't want to wait for it. I spent far too many years having to wait for my dream -- a dream I buried deep during the years I couldn't allow myself to remember what I wanted. To go around waiting for inspiration to strike me is a waste of any time I have left in this old world. I am prolific (in what I have in my files, not necessarily what will be published) only because I know I have to just sit and write; however, it is what I love to do and I find no struggle in the actual writing -- yes, there are "struggles" to being a writer, but, the actual writing is not one of them for me.

I do find inspirational surges when I am in nature, and especially when I am deep in the woods and my mind wanders as it becomes a part of all that is around me.

Music can create those surges as well. Though I can't listen to music as write, unless perhaps it is Music Without Words, and then only certain kinds and in certain circumstances.

There is this one piece of music by Angels of Venice, called (appropriately) LIONHEART that I have on a Natural Wonders cd. Every time that music played, I imagined Virginia Kate riding up her mountain, then there would be snatches of "scenes" from the beginning of the book - she'd be thrumming up the mountain on Fionadala's back, and first she'd be a young girl, but by time she reached the ridge, she was a woman, turning turning to release. The beginning of the book, where I have the part in italics (below) all came from this piece of music. I'd listen to it in my car and sometimes I'd cry -- the image of VK was so strong and so real, I'd get goosebumps. I'd say, "Go VK ... Ride! go!" and I'd dream of the day she'd be published so that you all could envision her as well. And now she is published. . . when I listen to LIONHEART now, I am still overcome, but now I know others can envision VK flying up the mountain.

I wanted to use this piece, or a portion of it, for the trailer, but there are copyright laws and all that, so I couldn't.

Here is the Angels of Venice website.

Here is (link won't work! sorry! dang!)-- I'm not sure this link will work so you can listen, especially when to the fiddles come in, that's the point where I'd get the goosebumps. I hope the music plays.

Here's one of the things I wrote to go with that music, what I visualized as the music played:

Grandma Faith wavers in the mists, the wolf calls, the owl flies, the mountain is. Up up I go on Fionadala’s back, her hooves thundering. I see my child’s eyes only, through the closet keyhole, dark eyes are open, then closed. Thundering hooves, up the mountain we ride. At the ridge I stop, take Momma from my pack. And there, with mountain song rising, with fog wetting, with Fionadala nodding her head, with the fiddles of the old ghosts of old mountain men crying, with the voices of all I’ve lost and all I’ve gained, with the mountains cradling, with the West Virginia soil darkening my feet, with Momma’s cry of “Do It!” I open her vessel, and as I twirl, turning turning turning, I let her out—she flies out with a sigh, with forty thousand sighs. As I come to rest, she settles upon me, settles upon the trees and mountain and rock, settles, then is finally stilled. The owl cries, the wolf calls, the mountain is, Grandma Faith nods. Momma is a part of it all now.

Now, you all have a good day: Go DO the day--and don't wait for inspiration, find it in the Doing.